So after pretty definitively killing off Michael Meyers in the end of the last movie, they decided to take this third one in a completely different direction. New story, new characters, and this one’s not even a slasher movie. I mean I guess it makes sense, the series is just called Halloween, there’s a lot of different things that could happen on that holiday. But everyone was so pissed that it had nothing to do with the first two that the movie flopped, was universally panned, and they brought back Michael Meyers for the fourth movie and every one since. So Halloween III just sort of sticks out as this weird standalone in the middle of a franchise. But let’s talk about it. It’s weird as hell. The plot revolves around a company called Silver Shamrock, run by the Old Man from Robocop, that basically owns this small town where their factory is. They believe in some sort of ancient Keltic witchcraft rituals surrounding Halloween and the sacrifice of children, so they manufacture masks with these weird computer chips in the back that are made out of pieces of stone henge and programmed to activate when a specific tune is played and kill the person wearing them. So they sell all the masks, then play a commercial with the activation code in it on Halloween night when they know all the kids will be watching them with their masks on, and die. An old middle aged doctor and some random woman half his age spend the whole movie investigating Silver Shamrock and also spending a lot of time having sex for no reason. Did I mention this company also has an army of robots that go around murdering people? Yeah, that too. It’s absolutely nuts, and doesn’t even have very much to do with witches, but it’s also a movie that’s super fun to watch. I mean, if that plot description doesn’t make you want to watch it, I don’t even know what to say to you. There’s also some really good gore, like when that one lady gets shot in the face with a laser. If you’ve seen it you know the scene I’m talking about, it’s awesome. Actually, I’m gonna put a picture of it at the top of this review, you really gotta see it. All that plus an awesome synth score and a lot of 80s cheese. Anyway that’s it. This movie is weird and bad and nuts and has almost nothing to do with any of the other Halloween movie, but it’s also goddamn hilarious and definitely worth watching.
Overall Rating: Not that witchy/10