Goldfinger Review



Sean Connery

Goldfinger is usually considered the best of the Sean Connery movies, and it’s kind of hard to argue. It’s certainly responsible for establishing a lot of the classic elements of the series. It’s the first time we see Q in his workshop, we see Bond drive his first Aston Martin (with the exact model later reappearing in Casino Royale and Skyfall), and we actually get the first proper Bond theme. The first movie just opens with the regular Bond score, and the second movie opens with generic spy score, then has a “From Russia With Love” song playing over the end credits, but this is the first one that set the traditional format we’re used to. And I have to say, it’s probably one of the best themes even to this day. I get it stuck in my head all the time. Anyway, this movie takes a break from the whole SPECTRE arc, and focuses on Bond trying to stop a single fat german millionaire trying to pull of a massive heist, the titular Auric Goldfinger, who looks uncannily like former Toronto mayor Rob Ford. Like, it’s actually super distracting. I can no longer watch this movie without making a bunch of crack and pussy-eating jokes to myself. Anyway, along the way we get a lot of really great moments, like the girl being painted gold to death, Pussy Galore’s flying circus, lots of cheating at golf, and one of my favourite James Bond lines ever: “My dear girl, there are some things that just aren’t done, such as drinking Dom Perignon ’53 above the temperature of 38 degrees Fahrenheit. That’s just as bad as listening to the Beatles without earmuffs”. It’s so funny to think of him as like this stuffy old dude who hates the Beatles, but I guess at the time it was still considered annoying young people’s music. Either way it’s not a line that aged super well. But the rest of this movie definitely has. The scene where Goldfinger has Bond tied up on the table with the laser slowly creeping towards his balls is pure tension. Not only is it a great scene on his own, but it’s really the most compromised we’ve ever scene the character so far. No gadgets, no guns, he’s completely at Goldfinger’s mercy, with only his wits to save him. And watching him desperately try to talk his way out of it as time quickly runs out is awesome. Then there’s the twist towards the end, where you find out what Goldfinger’s plan really is. It’s not like, mind shattering or whatever, but it’s a pretty clever idea, and the more these movies can keep you guessing the better. But for me the best part of the whole movie is the final showdown between Bond and Oddjob in Fort Knox. Oddjob’s just like this mountain of a man, and Bond’s going up against him with no weapons and a ticking clock. It’s a great fight, and the way Bond wins is really cool. Is it the best Bond movie of them all? Well, we’ll see, we got a lot more of these to talk about. But it’s definitely up there.

Overall Rating: As for these accusations, Goldfinger never said that, that’s ridiculous, he’s got Pussy Galore to eat at home. Get it? Come on, that’s gold baby. BOOM. Gold. I did it again. Try to keep up. /10


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